Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I have been thinking...

Not really. But it's 5am already. And everything is quiet. Well beside my itouch which is playing Caraphernelia now. That's very beside the point. The point is, I don't really have a point. And it's basically how I'm living my life right now. No purpose, no interest, no motivation. I'm just like q living dead yeah? Living life like a daily routine. One day, the limit is going to be up. I will no longer be able to take it. But till then... You think that I still be able to change my life? For the better I hope?
I guess you guys are thinking (if there is even anyone left) "wtf another emo post? I'm so fucking sick of her complaining about her life"
Yeah you know what? I'm fucking sick of myself too. I guess we just found something in common.
Le sigh~
I was watching YouTube videos just now, instead of studying. And I was thinking. Why can't I sing like her? Why can't I rap like her? Why can't I dance like them? Why can't I draw like him? Why can't I just be good at the smal pathetic talent I used to believe in. And then I just it just demoralize me further to know that my talent isn't even a fucking talent. I can't sing, I can't anything.
And then I realize, I have nothing. Nothing at all.

I wish I was things I'm not.
And I know deep inside me I'm never going to be whatever I wish for.

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