My secret revealed.

I was never the pretty girl.

Grew up as an ugly duckling and will always be one.

Thought I was always an extrovert but slowly becoming an introvert.

Always thought when in a room filled with strangers I would be the first one to know everybody.

But I slowly feel that i'm wrong.

Surrounded with people I feel awkward.

I don't know what to talk about.

I keep quiet.

Keep to myself.

Maybe I'm losing myself or maybe I just want to be alone.

Existential loneliness.

The feeling of being all alone even surrounded with people you love.

I suddenly feel like i don't even know myself.

I'm smiling. Yes I am. Don't be mistaken.

But I don't know if i meant that smile.